Non-Committal: Job Edition

Are there any other students (high school or university) that has trouble with the prospect of committing to a job whilst studying in school????????

Hi friends,

That was seven thousand too many question marks…sorry. In all realness and honesty though, I want a job. Do I?? Or do I just want money? Probably the latter because let’s be real, who doesn’t want money, but am I emotionally ready to give up 6+ hours of my time on a given day in order to get that money? I’m thankful that I’m in a position where I don’t have an immediate necessity for that money other than for personal material desires and not to pay phone bills or car insurance or rent or any of those things that come with adulthood. It’s not as if I’m not capable of working a job because I know I am as I have done work…but my extent of work is week long piano/voice camps and devoting my school time to hard work in my choir program. Nothing too extreme…but is a part-time job even extreme?!?!? No!!! But I can’t push myself to do it!! Every summer since I turned 16 (which was actually about 10 months later since my birthday is right after summer ends….bummer) I have compiled job applications and filled them out (mostly) and yet NEVER submitted them! I’m almost positive that I have probably just put them off with an excuse of being too young (or I just always did that stuff too late, I don’t remember quite well).

Is it because I subconsciously think that school should come first? Have my parents instilled some type of fear in my system that I don’t quite know about because I’ve never had to pay mind to it?? Maybe I’m too focused and determined for my future job (let’s hope I’m teaching music!) that I don’t think I should commit myself to any other type of job because if you look at my past job(s)….I’m teaching music! I’ve wanted to babysit but since I don’t know anyone under the age of 14 and practically everyone’s parents are much more trusting and lenient than mine were (..are?) none of them need babysitters and my parents don’t even have friends with children young enough for babysitting, I’m a bit shit out of luck there. I also want to teach piano lessons but apparently my mom doesn’t want me giving lessons at my piano in our house…. yep. I’ve tried approaching some of my students from when I did student option last year but most of them are busy with the school musical so if I have any prospect there I have to wait at least another month.

So in my head I’ve concocted that I could do freelance jobs!!!!!!……”like what,” she says an afterthought. If I could get paid for writing blog posts that’d be GREAT, but not all of us are Zoella or Tanya Burr, are we? I’d love to get sent free stuff or sent to cool places and have to write posts about them but again, we’re not all that lucky.

Years ago when I first started arranging music, I thought to myself, “Wow! If I keep this up, I could sell my arrangements for extra money!” To be honest, I still think I could, but again, I have been so noncommittal with them lately and just have a bunch of unfinished arrangements. I don’t know what it is, but it’s becoming frustrated.

Am I just meant to be a student for the rest of my life? Who knows?! I don’t!! Please, if anyone could shed some light on this issue, I would really appreciate any advice (so long as it’s positive…which all of you have been so far but you never know when a bad seed might appear y’know?)

13 February 2016


Students Are A Reward

Hi friends!

At the end of my senior year in high school, I spent my time creating little posters for every single person in my choir program, each adorned with everyone’s name in cute little font and dots and colorful paper. Why did I spend my time making 100+ posters? I don’t know. I love choir and people writing loving messages to one another and spreading positivity and other nice things, but that isn’t the point of this post.

My senior year, I was the Student Option for the Beginning Women’s Chorus—a Student Option is basically like a TA (teacher’s assistant)—and so obviously my students wrote on my poster as well as all over my yearbook (all the people who were student options aka 4 of us had to get a second poster haha—so many students!) I was reading over all their comments and I don’t know, my insides just felt all tingly. Is that weird? I’d like to think it isn’t.

When you get to read your own students write things like “you inspire me to work hard” or “you’ve taught me to never give up on my dreams” or “you showed me just how much fun music and choir can be” or “I was going to quit choir, but then you showed me how exciting it is”, well you get a little emotional. Because that was me four years ago. Four years ago, my student option inspired me and kept me from quitting choir (well, the plan was to defer for just my sophomore year but obviously that changed) and taught me how exciting the world of music is. Four years later, I find myself in the other shoes and I can’t be any more ecstatic. Obviously yes I love that my students adore me because duh who doesn’t want to be adored (imagine a hair flip happening now!), but as a teacher, all you could ever want is to see your students grow and learn to be ambitious and find joy in the things you’ve tried to teach them. As a teacher, you give them everything you’ve got, everything you’ve learned, everything you love, just so that they can grow into their own people and find their own way. To know you’ve got a part in something like that, that’s a big enough reward that I’ll be smiling back at the memories for decades.

After four long years of hard work and dedication to my high school choir program, my students showed me that none of that work was for nothing. All of that went toward a cause, a small one, but a cause no less. These students got the experience of music education, they were given the opportunity to experience the joy of music, and now they’re willing to fight for that same cause in their journey throughout high school. They too want to ensure that everyone has the right to an education in music and the opportunity to just enjoy music in school. To see the look of excitement for the years to come etched on their faces, I just know that all the time and energy I put in the music department went to something. I didn’t have to do any of that, but I did it anyway. Somewhere in myself I knew I had to and there was not escaping that. I hope that I’ve made their first year a joyous one and that they will strive to do the same for future students in our high school program. I hope that even if they don’t have my exact goals in mind, that they can look back at the times we’ve had and enjoy their time in choir and smile fondly at the memories. I hope they can make the best of friends that I have made in my time there.

Students are an immeasurable amount of joy if you’re willing to put your heart and soul towards them. You won’t receive as much gratitude if you don’t give them your all.

August 26 2015