So it’s been exactly a month since I have graduated high school and it’s kind of a crazy thought. Every time I think about school starting up in the fall, I have to remind myself that I’m going to college now and not back to my high school. I’m definitely excited for college, definitely dreading the workload to come, and definitely sad knowing that I won’t be coming back to the choir program that I’ve come to love at my high school.
My choir program back at my high school was my life, it was like my baby. Do you ever just care so much about someone or something that you just want to fight for it forever and make sure it improves and do everything you possibly can to better it? That’s what the music program at my school was for me, and I know it was that same way for some of my friends in not only choir but band too! We loved it there. But now we aren’t going back. Some of my friends are getting to jump back into the world of music in the fall at the Mason Gross School of the Arts or The College of New Jersey or the University of the Arts, but for me and another friend, well…we’re not? We didn’t get in to Mason Gross so it’s kind of a strange period right now where we’re in the college that we want to be in…but at the same time we’re not. I don’t get contribute to the music program at Mason Gross like I got to for my high school in the fall because I’m not in it, and yes I know that I can still do the choirs and a cappella groups but I’m not going to have the professors and the classes you know? In my first semester I have to take Calc 1, Expository Writing, Intro to Microeconomics, and hopefully one of the music classes I requested, be it an honors interdiscplinary course on Opera, a Byrne Seminar on the classical journey that is music, or intro to music theory which is probably filled with all the information I already know about music theory. It’s a tough thing for my mind to comprehend because all I ever know is music and I was so sure that I would be able to do it no matter what my parents told me. But now I have to reassess. Hopefully I’ll get in when I re-audition next year but right now everything’s just a big question. It’s difficult.
On the topic of everything else that isn’t music, it’s weird to just know that all those years of grade-level schooling is finished. You spend 13 years in one place and you finally get out and now you’re here. You’re one step closer to the real world with a real job and a new set of friends and a house and family all to yourself. It’s extremely scary to know that my age is only going up and it’s never going to go back down. Everything is just going to get bigger and harder but I’m also supposed to get stronger so I guess I just have to take life by the reins and attempt to hold on? As much as I said that I hated my high school (which I still do because it had so many other problems that had nothing to do with the academics and extracurriculars that I experienced), I’ve learned a lot. I’m pleased with the time I was given and I would never trade it for anything else and I don’t think there’s anything I wish would have been done differently. (How fitting, the end of that statement just reached the 618 word count. I graduated on June 18! Y’know, if you couldn’t tell by this “one month later” stuff).
If you’re still in high school, seize every good opportunity they hand to you because you’ll appreciate it in the long run. RU I hope you’re ready for me! I’m sure as hell not ready for you haha. Thanks everyone for your time.
July 18 2015